The have placed a limited quantity of some of these prints up for sale here
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^^^^^^^^^^ Notice the nice Dublin Messengers logo incorporated!
20% off during January with the promo code: januarysale
Enjoy!
I'm a messenger in Dublin!
By Thriftcriminal | February 20, 2008
Pete’s brakes screeched as he pulled up beside me, dismounted and dexterously unclipped his lock.
“Hey, how’s the form?”
“Give me a minute to calm down”
Pete locked the bike to the railings and removed his helmet.
“I fucking hate middle aged Foxrock women in big expensive cars”
“What happened this time?”
“Stupid cow did what they all do, overtook me and turned left almost immediately. It’s always some middle aged wench in a big fucking Merc or Beemer that their hubby bought them to make them feel their existence is in some way worth while”
“Chip on shoulder much?”
“Look, I cycle right?”
“So do I”
“No, no. What you do can only be described as ‘Faire des promenade aux bicyclette’, you refuse to take the right approach to dealing with the urban cycling environment. You are a wuss bag.”
“You mean I refuse to run red lights, hop onto curbs to avoid standing traffic and annoy motorists as much as possible?”
“Precisely. I behave in as arrogant a manner as possible on the road and expect all other road users to defer to my whim. This is my right as a cyclist, more vulnerable road user, and ecological high horse rider”
“And the broken collar bone last year”
“Proves it”
“Ah. So, the irrational problem with your target demographic is that they try to kill you?”
“No. They try to out arrogant me. Totally unacceptable. Roll on crossbar mounted side-winder missiles”
Topics: imaginary conversations |
"...still on the subject of walkers, there was a flurry of letters on this page recently from outraged Dublin pedestrians, angry at the invasion of their space by cyclists. Fair enough. On behalf of the cycling community, I apologise for the excesses of our militant fringe.
But while pedestrians are probably entitled to an even higher position in the hierarchy of self-righteousness than cyclists, they are not without faults themselves. And along with my apology, I wonder if I might also offer them a small note of criticism. If we cyclists are to avoid your footpaths, is it possible that you pedestrians might stay out of our bicycle lanes? I don't mean the ones on public roads, necessarily. If walkers want to share with us the thrill of never knowing when we will be mown down by a reckless motorist, good luck to them. No, I mean those special cycling routes in public parks - the ones with colour coding and little bicycles painted at intervals to let walkers know that they should be somewhere else.
Even here, I don't mind the occasional stroller intruding, just so long as he gets out of your way in time and looks gratifyingly apologetic. But such pedestrians are unusual in my experience. And the enjoyment of, for example, the Phoenix Park's bike paths is greatly diminished for cyclists by the numbers of walkers who clog them up, with the same sense of entitlement as they do the public footpaths.
These are not just strollers, either. Unfortunately, public parks attract high numbers of "power walkers", who pump their arms violently as they go, in such a way that a cyclist approaching from the rear and mistiming his passing manoeuvre even slightly can be knocked clean off his bike.
There are other risks too. Casual walkers who use one hand to hold a mobile phone and the other for gesticulating carry the added danger of being unpredictable. And don't get me started about dreamy young lovers, whose lack of lane discipline even on ordinary city footpaths is one of the biggest risks faced by bicycle couriers at this time of year.
But these summer evenings, the power-walkers are out in force in all the parks. And I can only explain their serial misappropriation of cycle lanes - rare as such things still are - by the fact that, for aerobic reasons, they have to hold their heads up while walking and thus never see the markings on the ground."
A man has been killed in a crash in Dublin this morning.
The male cyclist, believed to be in his 30s, died on Harold's Cross Road after a collision with a cement truck. No one else was injured in the crash, which happened at about 10.30am.
The road is shut in both directions from Leonard's Corner at the Upper Clanbrassil Street junction to the canal bridge to allow Garda forensic investigators examine the scene.
GardaĆ are at the scene and are diverting outbound traffic via the South Circular Road. AA Roadwatch is advising inbound traffic to turn around and divert through Leinster Road and Rathmines.
According to AA Roadwatch, access has been blocked from from Lower Kimmage Road onto Harold's Cross Rod, and traffic is therefore busy on Kenilworth Road inbound.
February 20th, 2008 at 8:25 pm
Haha talk about the mouse that roared! Although our bloody cycle couriers would knock a pedestrian over in a wink! There’s a hierachy you know bikes kill pedestrians, cars kill bikes, trucks kill cars. I’m catching the train!
February 21st, 2008 at 7:51 am
You’re hilarious you know.
I love these posts.
February 21st, 2008 at 9:55 am
Cheers guys. I particularly enjoy these too. It’s fun to come up with this sort of nonsense
February 21st, 2008 at 3:16 pm
I particularly enjoy opening car doors into the paths of cyclists. You get extra points if you can get them to go through the window.
February 21st, 2008 at 4:14 pm
K8, I think that qualifies for sidewinder action
Happened a mate of mine once. It was VERY funny normally he was captain gel with bloody ralph lauren shirts, very full of himself. That whack brought him down a notch or two. For a short while anyway.